Talking to Your Child About Diabetes

If your child has been diagnosed with type 1 or type 2 diabetes, you may feel shocked, sad, or even angry or guilty at first — feelings that are perfectly normal.

But the more you learn about diabetes, the less anxious and better prepared you'll be to talk about it with your child.

Getting Started

Be sure to talk to your child in an age-appropriate way and to always tell the truth. And don't be put off by your child's questions — answering them can help you learn more about diabetes, too.

Kids who've been diagnosed with diabetes may feel that they've done something wrong to have caused the disease. It's important for parents to emphasize, especially to younger children, that kids don't do anything wrong to get diabetes.

Make sure your child knows that diabetes is not going away, and that it's OK to feel sad or upset about having it. Encourage your child to talk about it openly. Also discuss the diabetes diagnosis with your other kids, who may be jealous of the extra attention their sibling is getting or concerned about developing diabetes themselves.

Sending the Right Message

The words you use can send a powerful message about diabetes — and your child's role in managing it. Be positive. Emphasize that together you can get diabetes under control, and avoid using terms like "cheating" and "being bad" if your child veers from the diabetes management plan. Instead, help your child understand the relationships between eating and exercise and how they affect blood sugar levels.

Because kids look to their parents for guidance, how you deal with diabetes can directly affect how your child communicates with you about it. If you're stressed out about diabetes, chances are your child will be, too. For example, getting upset a high blood sugar level may make it less likely that your child will be honest about blood sugar readings in the future.

It's also hard to expect kids with diabetes to limit sugary treats or get regular exercise if siblings and parents don't do the same. Have a family discussion about why living a healthy lifestyle is important for everyone — not just people with diabetes. By including all family members in meal planning and other activities, your child won't feel like an outsider or that he or she is somehow being punished for having diabetes.

Diabetes Discussions for Different Ages

Here are some tips for tailoring diabetes discussions to a child's age:

Infants and toddlers don't understand why they need to have shots or get their fingers or toes poked. To help, try to make blood sugar testing and giving insulin part of your child's daily routine, like diaper changes or going down for a nap. Perform diabetes care quickly and gently, in a soothing manner, and reassure your child with calming words afterward.

Preschoolers still rely on parents for their diabetes care. Explain diabetes-related tasks in simple terms. Parents can also help them feel some sense of control by letting kids tell them where they'd prefer to have their insulin injection and which finger to use for a blood glucose test.

Kids in grade school through middle school should be learning how to take on some of their diabetes care, but still need parental involvement. Be supportive, but don't push as your child gradually takes on self-care responsibilities. Your doctor or diabetes health care team can guide you regarding which tasks are appropriate at each stage. As kids grow, they become increasingly interested in doing things independently and more sensitive about seeming different from their peers. Offer praise whenever your child assumes a new self-care responsibility, but be understanding of temporary setbacks — which can be especially common when kids feel stressed. Avoid being overprotective and reinforce the goal and expectation that kids with diabetes can do anything that kids without diabetes can do. Also discuss how having your child take responsibility for diabetes can make it easier to go to fun events like parties and sleepovers.

Teens may make poor decisions regarding their diabetes care because of peer pressure, the fear of being different from their friends, and a feeling of invincibility. It's important to talk about drugs, alcohol, sexuality, and other issues with your teen and how they could affect the diabetes and overall health. There is a fine line between offering support and lecturing, so express your concerns in a caring manner.

For kids of any age, finding a support group can help them connect with other kids with diabetes so they'll feel less different.

Honest, open communication is key when talking to kids and teens about diabetes. The more you talk with and involve your child in diabetes care, the better prepared you'll both be when you're apart.

Reviewed by: Steven Dowshen, MD
Date reviewed: June 2011

Related Resources

National Institute of Diabetes and Digestive and Kidney Diseases This group conducts and supports research on many serious diseases affecting public health.

American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry (AACAP) AACAP offers up-to-date information on child and adolescent development and issues.

American Diabetes Association (ADA) The ADA website includes news, information, tips, and recipes for people with diabetes.

Joslin Diabetes Center On-Line Library The website of this Boston-based center has more than 30 articles about how you can monitor blood sugar and manage diabetes.

Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation International (JDRF) JDF's mission is to find a cure for diabetes and its complications through the support of research.

Diabetes Center Does your child have type 1 or type 2 diabetes? Learn how to manage the disease and keep your child healthy.

Your Child's Diabetes Health Care Team When you have a child with diabetes, you and your family have a lot to learn, but you don't have to go it alone. Your child's diabetes health care team can help.

Diabetes: Dealing With Feelings If your child has diabetes, you may spend a lot of time thinking about the physical effects. But it's also important to understand the emotional issues surrounding a diabetes diagnosis.

Treating Type 2 Diabetes Kids who are diagnosed with type 2 diabetes will need a diabetes management plan to help them manage the condition and stay healthy and active.